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[Robert Yarger]

Johan, you got off too easy, or perhaps you should be looking over your shoulder for a while (you know for a sneak attack or something).  I forgot to mention that redheads can be shifty like that. 

Mine will hold grudges for ages, and you never know when something you did 10 years ago is going to resurface to poke you in the eye.  My belief is forgive and forget, but my wife does the forget then forgive thing.  Oh, also redheads are very opinionated.  I shutter and have to walk out of the room when somebody gets my wife going on religion or politics.  She has told everyone who has come over who to vote for this next election, and won't take no for an answer. 

Oh, and you can never win with a redhead.  If you do happen to win, then lookout because something strange has shifted in the cosmos.  SPICY!!!!!  Around here in the woods we have a saying.  "Beware of copperheads".

 

[Johan Heyns]

What's the difference between a terrorist and a redhead? You can negotiate with a terrorist

What's the quickest way to a man's heart for a redhead? Through the breastbone

Only two things are necessary to keep a redhead happy.
One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.

[Barbara Devost]

ROBERT;  THERE YOU ARE.  I FIGURED YOU HAD LEFT TO GO FIND SOME BACKUP TO BATTLE THE REDHEAD.  SINCE YOU'RE OLDER THAN ME, I FIGURE  I CAN LET IT SLIDE.

[Barbara Devost]

JOHAN,  KEEP THE REDHEAD JOKES COMING! THEY'RE SPOT ON(SO FAR).

[Johan Heyns]

If you love a redhead, she'll love you forever.
If you turn your back on her, it'll be the last thing you ever do.  

I will retire on this note! Robert, my advice is to do the same.

John, are you sure she's got shoes on?

[Johan Heyns]

A redhead walks into a drug store and tells the pharmacist she needs some cyanide.

The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady then explained she needed it to poison her husband. 

The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, "Lord have mercy, I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license, they'll throw both of us in jail and all kinds of bad things will happen! Absolutely not, you can NOT have any cyanide!"

Then the lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now, you didn't tell me you had a prescription."

[Canuck]

I like that one

[Johan Heyns]

A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp.

He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie. The genie said "OK, OK. You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!"

The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive my car there?"

The genie laughed , "That's impossible. Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete-how much steel! And the maintenance of that bridge! No - think of another wish."

The man said OK and tried to think of a really good wish.

Finally, he said, "I'm married to a redhead. So, I wish that I could understand her... know how she feels inside and what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment...... know what she really wants when she says 'nothing'... know how to make her truly happy......I want to know how she can be so damn sexy one second and be the devils daughter, the next. I really want to understand her and how she thinks!"

The genie said, "You want that bridge with two lanes or four?"

[Canuck]

ROTFLOL...

[Robert Yarger]

I'm not touching that one.  I see that Barb is currently online.